Simon Doonan at the NY Obsever notices that metrosexuality isn’t dead after all and is busily getting straight men’s legs in the air:
Straight guys need to ditch their new aesthetic preoccupations, stop trying to turn themselves into sleazy porn studs, and go back to being drones and breadwinners. You fellows were the last bastion of self-denying un-vanity, and now look! Between your plucked privates and John Edwards’ $400 haircut, the entire social structure of America has been thrown into a reeling dis-equilibrium. Between the gays and the gals there are enough queens in the hive already. Throw away the Nair, put your Dockers and golf shirts back on, and get back to work.
It is, as Doonan obviously is aware, a forlorn hope. Straight American males have tasted the Royal Jelly and won’t accept Jell-O anymore.
Or shit sticking to their man-fur.
Tip: Peter McQuaid
The thought of a woolly mammoth in my boxer briefs, noway! Actually, having pubic hair seems so extinct, like dinosaurs.
Of the delights of this world, man cares most for sexual intercourse, yet he has left it out of his heaven. – Mark Twain – Samuel Langhorne Clemens (1835-1910)
If you haven’t tried shaving your groin area, don’t do it. But, at least try it once before you go gonzo on another man’s freedom. Heaven… smooth skin against fine Egyptian cotton boxers, bikini briefs or a ‘real man’s’ thong, feels like silk touching you all day long. No wonder women love to feel smooth skin. I’ve been shaving my groin for one year now and I feel cleaner now than I did for the last 35 years. I no longer feel corrupted by society’s ancient mindset.
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